My boss asked why it was taking me so long to get reports emailed to him and I jokingly replied that it was an issue with my keyboard because I’m right-handed, but a majority of the keys I use are closer to my left hand. I thought this was a light-hearted way of responding when I clearly had no excuse for the reporting delays. The boss thought I was serious and called IT to see if he could get the problem sorted.
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At ten o’clock this morning, My Boss finally deciphered the note he’d written himself weeks ago and then came rushing out of his office to inform us that we had two hours to do the work that normally takes two weeks. He helped facilitate this miracle by screaming at us all… FAIL!
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Every Friday we have ‘casual dress day’ at work. Last week my boss comes-in wearing a Tshirt that said “the flogging will continue until morale improves”. He thought this was hilarious. To then make things worse, he went around the office telling everyone to read his shirt as if we were all too stupid to notice what it said. Makes me want to make a shirt that says “my boss is a wanker” and then go up to him and ask what he thinks of MY shirt.
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My boss is hiring interns to help out with our software workload, problem is he seems to expect them to become instantly able to produce documentation and coding additions to our current software with absolutely no training….FAIL!!!!
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I worked for one boss who’s stock phrase seemed to be “Have you written a test plan for that?”. This seemed to be the only measure of software quality that they could comprehend. What made this seem totally ludicrous to me was that this particular manager did not seem to care about the quality of the test plans nor did they check that they had actually been used. As long as there was a test plan in existence for each module they were happy.
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Our boss organized for an efficiency audit of our IT department. A guy came in and sat with our Sys Admin for two weeks saying he was going to write an audit on his processes and practices. The Sys Admin guy worked his butt off, but at the end of the two weeks go fired. Turns out there was never any audit: this was just the boss’s way of replacing the IT people without disruption, making sure the new guy was trained up and the old guy didn’t cause any damage before he left.
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My boss is always saying gratuitously offensive things like, “I didn’t fall off the turnip truck yesterday, I know you are [insert accusation]” or “when you have a big club, you have to not be afraid to use it, so I’m going to [insert bullying].” Great guy… NOT… FAIL!
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Applied for a new job. 2 days before the interview, the manager found out that the budget for his department had dried up, and there was no hope of funding it any time in the near future. But the manager (and HIS manager, no less) decided to go ahead with the interview, even though there was no chance I’d be hired. Found out 2 weeks later, and only because I asked directly what the status of the interview was. Makes me glad I never got a chance to work there. FAIL!!
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Whenever my boss prepares a memo (usually only a few lines of text) he’ll create it using fancy Word Templates, so you get this stupid massive email attachment with a huge file size that clogs-up the office network all for about 255 characters of actual text.
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Just started a new job… my boss who gave me no training (just said “answer the phone”) and then got mad when I had to ask her questions. FAIL!
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